Conversations with a narcissist leaves you feeling like your mind has been raped

A conversation as mundane as how you woke up this morning, or what you're wearing to church can turn awkward really quick and things can escalate to personal attacks.

A few examples of what it's like to talk with these types of people:

I went camping with a friend recently. I set my alarm for the next morning. After we both woke up he asked me how I woke up.

Friend: Did your alarm clock wake you up this morning?

Me: Yes, at 7:00

Friend: Well, I woke up naturally

On the surface this might seems like an off-handed comment to make (that they simply woke up without an alarm clock). But when a narcissist says it, it's for a whole different reason: it provides an immediate ego boost and dose of dopamine, like how a drug addict gets a fix. They are CONSTANTLY comparing themselves to others and look for any ways possible to get their fix. When you don't provide them with their narcissistic supply, they will become maligned like that.

And today was another boiling point. I usually dress up for church in a dress shirt and dress pants. He wears jeans and an untucked dress shirt. Fine, I never said a word. This morning, as I usually do, I threw on a pair of jean shorts and t-shirt this morning before eating breakfast. He approaches me and says "you can wear that to church if you want, you don't have to dress up".

I said "I don't wear street clothes to church". And the conversation went sour really quick when he pointed out about how the bible doesn't say what to wear. ("Let's get ready to rummmmble!!!!!") Remember: almost everything a narcissist says actually has a twisted motive: to make them feel better about them selves and to make YOU feel bad about yourself. NEVER forget this.

I should point out that most of the people at my church wear dress shirts and dress pants, not jeans. He took no hesitation to haughty point out how the bible doesn't say what to wear, at which point he made sure to add "as long as your don't wear baggy gym shorts".

Now, any normal person would immediately see the logical flaw in this conversation...I shouldn't have to point it out. If the bible doesn't say what to wear, than why would it be wrong to wear anything you wanted? I simply said "I don't wear street clothes to church" and it was interpreted as a personal attack on him at which point he looked for ways in vain to criticize everyone but himself.