A question for the lovely ladies of glp

How old are you?

what should a man be looking for in a wife?

The ability to change and adapt, not be set in her ways. Not only is it a sign of intelligence, she'll always be full of surprises for you.

Also, is it a bad idea to tell women you are looking for a wife?

I told my husband right away I was looking for a husband but he also wanted a wife so I guess I got lucky. But it may be different reaction from a woman, IDK. I don't beat around the bush or play games so I guess if she knows you are serious, you'll get a serious answer as opposed to I have to get to know you dating blah blah blah.

I am 32. I know what I'd like to an extent, have had a few girlfriends, a couple serious relationships. I just thought it might be interesting to hear the views of women who ought to be unbiased since they don't know me. Besides, women I assume know a lot about themselves. Hopefully I can get some thoughtful responses.

Ok, that's fair

I would say, look for someone that you simply enjoy being with - a friend, a companion, a playmate, a partner. Picture yourself and your future wife in old age then find the younger her!

That is what I would like. Of course I want to know the person, and yes getting married is a huge commitment, but I want a family and not just something shallow and noncommittal. On the one hand marriage is taking a risk, but on the other if two people really want to be married and stay married there is no reason why that shouldn't work. If the relationship is a priority to them both, that is. Dating excessively seems like a way to avoid that commitment after a point. So that is a waste for someone who is ready to take the next step.

That is an interesting way to look at it.

Not sure why my ac# keeps changing. Probably been hacked by those wiley russians.

Try writing up a marriage contract with what you will do and expect from a wife. Have her do the same, that will keep you both bound to your words and not some surface vows you say in front of people. This contract should be specific about your expectations in the marriage. Yes, you have to be serious on wanting it to work, love it, hate it, you must do it, unconditional love. Those were some of my grandmothers words and I made sure my husband knew this was my attitude towards our future marriage. I had never seen him in person before we chose each other and when I saw him he wasn't exactly what I thought was my type physically but, when I saw him through the window at the airport, I said to myself, love him hate him, you must. I was so nervous when I saw him I tripped over my luggage, he teased me because I told him I pack light and I had 3 huge suitcases with me but most of it was gifts for his family.

Last Edited by nah-t on 10/30/2014 03:01 PM

Is it ok if i ask where are you guys from? I know it isn't really relevent but it is hard for me to imagine a girl with that attitude here. Also, what sort of stuff did you guys put on your contract? You don't have to tell me if it is personal or private though. Did you guys pretty much agree to the same things, or have much input on what the other agreed to? Or was it more like here is what I am willing to do, take it or leave it? How did you guys meet?

I just got to say something….OP, start with the basics….like….

was this by your own choice?

Test drive that bitch for at least a year…


She should be healthy, mentally and physically. She should be unafraid to get dirty. If she regularly spends over $100 on a single clothing item, find someone else.


You never let women think you have any intention of putting a ring on it… EVER. You want her to keep working for it. I suggest never marrying, but you're an idiot, so.

And you are what, damaged goods?

[link to www.google.es]

Hmm. I guess it is like any other business transaction, the more you want the longer you have to wait to find a deal. If you are in a hurry, you have to lower your standards. I'm not in a hurry, its not like I am 50+. I just wanted to hear what women think makes a good wife and what is reasonable to expect out of them.

Lol wtf?

Why would you talk to MO like that?
For all of us 50+ ers

I usually don’t respond to threads like these, but you seem sincere and nice, so here is my advice and I hope you find a love that lasts.

A sense of humor is very important. She should never take herself so seriously that she can’t laugh at herself from time to time or enjoy a good joke.

She doesn’t need to be a rocket scientist, but stay away from stupid. No matter how “hot” she is you will get tired of a woman without a working brain.

She needs to be able and willing to work hard. If she cringes at a broken nail; not good. Take her fishing, if she won’t bait her own hook, she may not be what you are looking for, and if you ever have children, get used to the idea of changing all of the diapers yourself.

Ideally she is stable enough to hold down a real job.
In short, she needs to be a partner, not a princess, and she needs to be able to pull her share of weight in the relationship.

The most important thing, is she needs to be an honest decent person, who will not lie, cheat, or steal. All of these things will destroy your life.

Good luck to you…happily married here, wouldn't change a thing about him.

Lol nothing wrong with 50+, I was just imagining that if I were older I might be in more of a rush, assuming I still felt the same.

IDK about MO, obviously I have had some failed relationships since I am not married and have no kids, but does that really mean the best plan is to intentionally string someone along forever? If it was a joke I didn't realize it. Either way, if that works for someone else ok, but that isn't my goal.

You do need to do something pretty quick…
By your mid 40's you'll be getting pretty slap wore out…lol!!!
Wouldn't have it any other way though….been married a long time!

Fishing is a good idea. And yes, good character is paramount. And brains is a big one too, it would be tough having dumb kids and watching them fail.

He's from Macedonia, I was born in the USA and raised here but made in Macedonia and raised a little differently from the traditional American where family values are concerned.

We were specific about finances, who would handle them and who earns them, responsibilities with children, household duties, basic living expectations. How money is spent, but mostly saved. I told him things that I would do too that made me more appealing, like not having friendships with females (I didn't have male friends) while we are married so they wouldn't interfere or take time away from my life with him. I never understood girls night out anyway. I did tell him the less attractive things about myself too like not being a very good cook but he actually liked that because his father did most of the cooking in his house and said women are not good cooks anyways.

I told him I didn't want children because I had one already but he wanted them and that was his only demand that I adjusted to. He said no children, no marriage. Then I knew he was serious so I'm kinda glad I went into it without wanting them. That was the only deal breaker, everything else we agreed on because it was just practical.

We met online, I went on some international dating website and found his profile. He couldn't afford to pay for a membership so he encrypted his email in the profile.

What I like the most about how we did it, we didn't have any feelings involved so we weren't manipulated by one or the other. We also are non-conformists and not so traditional in the way we do things, we were both against a wedding ceremony in a church, just jeans and t-shirt civil union, too embarrassing to have all that attention.

We don't have much in common outside our family life, he likes cars and working on them, he likes guy stuff and I like whatever, I'm easily amused. But we do laugh a lot and have a great time when we are together as a family. I think we also discussed something along the lines of being independent in our own ways, not being emotionally needy like not being able to do something without the other.

Well, someone who you love and loves you back is most important. Someone who you can talk to about everything, and shares your interests and preferences. You want someone who is compatible and desires the same things in life you do. These are the things that will last. Just be yourself, and you will not go wrong.

He was just shorter than I had thought was my type. Nothing weird. Yes, it was my choice. I even told him that if he decided against it I was going to run off with the gypsies and never go back to the USA.

op
This happened to me a few years ago - i was fresh out of a bad marriage - this guy (considered a good catch by most) asked me out.

The very first date he told me i was the woman he had been looking for all his life and started talking marriage. I promptly ran the other way.

So, dont put that kind of pressure on her right away. Get to know her a little and let her get to know you.

Lol, off with the gypsies huh? That sounds exciting! Sometimes I think that I should run off with the gypsies lol.

Emerald did pretty good, just have to say that I don't bait my own hooks, but am not afraid of getting my hands dirty otherwise, and happily change dirty diapers! (Very scarring childhood incident, makes me quirky- not high maintenance). :)

Best advice, what kind of woman do you want beside you when you are 70. Good luck.

Yeah I have learned the hard way that some ladies panic when they feel pressure. I have a hard time not being too direct. It is tough to know how other people will receive your message.

When we were dating, my husband took me fishing and we had a great time. He thought I was just being a "good sport" in going fishing with him. I was much later the he found out that I really love to fish.

Lol. I love to fish too, just prefer artificial bait. Honestly, I think fishing, canoeing, hiking are all great dates! (Hint, hint).