I constantly mutter negative things. death, dying, killing. WHY?

I know...






Could it be...







Hmm...







maybe...



very possibly be...










Satan?

better watch out, the thought police just busted four guys who planted playdoe at a synagog.

OP-I have to tell you I have never heard of this.
Maybe it is like some kind of epilepsy of the mind?
Like some kind-of mental Tourettes syndrome?
Maybe a shrink could help you-a good one.
Or maybe you will be able to help yourself.
If this is real, it is unusual.

turn the fraking TV off!

I didn't think it was uncommon.

I've done it for 15 years or so, mostly suicidal thoughts even when not depressed, killing people, hate, abuse, self harm, many grotesque things.

I had a brief absence from it all after a stint with mushrooms, weed, and meditation. Really amazing time. But then I gave up the weed (temporarily), and i'm back my old self. I liken it to being fed to the wolves on a daily basis, surrounded by demons, blah, that's life.

You may be possessed by the entity known as "Negative Nancy" OP.
[link to www.urbandictionary.com]
Seek an exorcist. Or here is a good book you can read that has good mediations and positive affirmations you can give.
[link to www.amazon.com]

This has been diagnosed as OCD in some cases. That could be it. I would also look into the Tourettes possibility.

Damn zetas strike again

Habit ? Programming from youth ?

It helps so be aware it is happening so you can begin the process of re-programming yourself. Simply noticing and deciding each time if whatever is on your mind is a true emotion/ statement and purposefully changing the thought.



Good Luck

Thought behavior can be changed.

Try some of the old methods from yoga, meditation.

Try some religious methods like praying and thanking God and others, if you are religious

If you want to try therapy (either yourself or with a professional) you could try "Dialectic Behavior Therapy" (DBT) or "Cognitive Behavior Therapy" (CBT). Both therapies work with thought behavior.

Most people don't realize that you can change your mental landscape, but you can. It's not easy tho.

Whenever you change your mental landscape or thought behaviors it takes at least 3 months to take hold. That's because our brains are coded with organic tissue and it takes a while to change thinking. That's why AA and college courses tend to focus on 3 month periods.

Very possible. How much stress are you under during everyday life? Are you often frusturated by little 'imperfections', such as untidy stacking of books, ect? OCD and the frustration, anger and stress it causes can lead to depression, or even just depressive thoughts. As Only Me said, tourettes may be the cause. Do you twitch often, or yell for no reason? Professional help would be the first thing to do, I would reccomend seeing a shrink or psychiatrist.
Hope you figure it out!

Yes, TV is a constant stream of negative things and violence.

you are getting too *fishburger* existential OP. What you need to do is just go out there *do your fly up* and punch something. Even just a streetsign *fuck! my knuckles hurt* or a prostitute *last chicken in the shop*. Just let that frustration out *flaps*

Although I wouldn't reccomend those methods, OP, releasing frustration could do a great deal of help. Go out to the beach, an open paddock or somewhere quiet and relatively unpopulated, and scream your lungs out. Just scream your anger and frustraition into the wind. A punching bag helps, IMO kicking the shit out of one takes a load of the mind (and no one gets hurt).

Yep damn straight.
Something that always takes the strain off me is going and splitting a whole bunch of wood. The world somehow seems less threatening when you show a log who's boss.

You are aware of the problem, and that is 99% of the battle.

Find a spiriutal path that appeals to you NOW and get on it.

Here is a simple mantra you can say or think everytime you have a negative thought. It is designed to combat anger, but will work on most thoughts and feelings.

OM AKSHYOBA HUM. (HUM is pronounced hoong)