Just found an old notebook from when I was 18...

Wow! 18... I was a total retard who thought I knew it all. I was not even as thoughtful as you. I was a stoner too. I was sad. I am happy now I hope you are too.

OP is 19.

I was wondering the same thing?

I enjoyed reading your thoughts!

When I was in High School I also kept diaries. I am 33 now and ocassionally will sit down with a box and review my old thoughts and doodles. It's amazing how many things I would not had remembered unless reminded and then it ALL comes flowing rapidly back to me! Besides the personal ones, My friends and I would share "notebooks" we specially created with magazine cut-outs that decorated the front covers. We would pass these along in the halls during our 5 minute passing periods and basically they were filled with gossip, questions, letters/notes, poems and art. This was something I started with different friends at the time so I somehow was able to keep alot of them.

It never gets old reflecting back and seeing how "naive" or "smart" things sounded or seemed at different times!

When I moved out of the house when I was 21 my mother missed me dearly since I moved all the way across the country. She told me she would sit up at night and read through them! I was angry at first but she really didnt think I would mind! We never discussed alot of the "things" in there, but I was a pretty WILD teenager and my girlfriends and I disclosed many different types of experiences you wouldnt want your parents to know type stuff in these journals.

Aftern I realized my mom couldnt ground me anymore I eventually just let it go!!! Thanks for the post OP! :) Brought back some great memories and thanks for letting me share! :):hf:

Haha .. can´t remember much between 16 and 19 as i discovered alcohol to drown my constant failure with women.

I have my old hard disk from that time.

contains a load of games, a shitload of shitty self-made stm-tracker files trying to be techno and porn that was circulated at zip-disks and Fidonet at that time in awesome 256 color GIF format.

Sounds fun!

Thanks op, you made me feel better about my old scribblings, they were terrible too. (i mean that in a nice way.. Ha)

Looking forward to the day when I'll feel the same about today's scribblings. Always growing, always moving forward.

Fuck a computer? Shit they were only in Big Big Business, gov't and military when I was that old. Old rich prick kids and geeks had video games like Atari. If your over 40 and a "gamer" you need to grow up and then get get your fucking pussy little lights punched out.

Yeah and we drank to get pissed out of minds drunk and have fun not to lament or hide from. We were a few years older than "Kid Rock" in his song

Ahhh, and I thought that it would be full of porn!!!

Well .. can remember yellow color displays and the dude who had a father who had a PC that actually could run Wing Commander was the hero at basic school.

I'm 24 now, so the notebook is about 6 years old. Some moron gave me neg karma for this thread.


I've never kept a proper diary, was always scared someone might read it! Recently my poetry has acted as a kind of diary.

I was really, really stupid when I was 18...

I knew it ALL at 18, I wasn't stupid. Turns out by 24 I was a friggin' mow-ron...funny how that happens. I especially liked the OP's quote here-

"Me: "We're really dumb."
Him: "That, or really really clever"
Me: "No, I just think we're really dumb."


LOL, I was that stoned around that age too I think, maybe at 19 actually. Good post OP.

I found an old box in storage about a month ago
from in my 20's. I'm now in my 40's.

Inside the box was a lil black book
with LOTS of phone numbers.

Tons of pictures of me and different
gf's I've had. Some were semi nude
and some were totally nude :)

Tons of greeting cards from old gf's.

Stacks of old love letters,
I mean NASTY letters of what
they actually did and wanted to do.

and then found a pair of red panties,
a pair of black panties and a pink bra
and a couple of hair clasps of where
they left either on the night stand
or on the floor or in the bathroom.

ya see females leave things HID sometimes
so they think they are leaving it for other
girls to find to mark their territory.
I got wise to that after finding my first pair
of panties a girl left under the corner
of my sofa cushion. Then another one
left her bra under my bed.

girls are like that bro ;)
then when you ask them about it,
they play it off as they forgot
it by accident. yea right ;)

some things I kept as a keep sake
and some I threw away.

I just can't bring myself to
get rid of that stuff.

so many good memories ;)

I think its fun when we run in to old writings, I found an old notebook of poems I wrote years ago.....wish I could start up again. It would be like the wind it just comes up out of you..

Hold on to your old writings much to learn from.