My life went to shit when I deviated from my life path

I was supposed to learn about intellectual pursuits and pleasures of solitary monk-like life in this reincarnation, but I slipped back into the old work-and-family routine I have played over and over again in my past lives.

Now I am conflicted with the disapproval of my soul who thinks I just wasted my life and might as well finish it respawn again, and my sense of duty and love.