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Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76357788
Australia
02/10/2019 03:14 PM
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Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
It was a code red situation as the stench was overbearing, I had to think fast before anyone realised I was the culprit.

Being a seasoned professional I knew that walking away from the area would drag the foul smell along with me affording all in the vacinity a chance to label me as the offender.

I didn’t hesitate and in that moment I seized the day and proclaimed loudly, “For crying out loud, which one of you farted!?!”, while looking at all the McDonalds staff behind the counter.

I then screwed up my nose and turned around to judge the reactions on those waiting behind me and not a moment too soon as the lady directly behind me just got her first whiff.

Her neck snapped back and her head flung around in absolute disgust as she attempted to cope with the putrid aroma now filling her nostrils.

I quickly gauged the look on all the other faces and they appeared to be looking at the staff not me.

So I turned around to witness the manager speaking very sternly to all the staff who were present as I blurted out my dismay.

One of the female staff was staring at me with dagger eyes and I avoided her gaze so as to not give myself away.

I could hear those behind complaining about the disgusting smell and how employees should know better than to do something like that.

I received my order with an apology from the manager along with a small discount.

Mission accomplished.
nimmerfall

User ID: 72716118
United States
02/10/2019 03:17 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
bro story, cool
"Do you believe in an afterlife?" the gunslinger asked him as Brown dropped three ears of hot corn onto his plate.

Brown nodded. "I think this is it."
Garufal

User ID: 76948125
United States
02/10/2019 03:20 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
It was a code red situation as the stench was overbearing, I had to think fast before anyone realised I was the culprit.

Being a seasoned professional I knew that walking away from the area would drag the foul smell along with me affording all in the vacinity a chance to label me as the offender.

I didn’t hesitate and in that moment I seized the day and proclaimed loudly, “For crying out loud, which one of you farted!?!”, while looking at all the McDonalds staff behind the counter.

I then screwed up my nose and turned around to judge the reactions on those waiting behind me and not a moment too soon as the lady directly behind me just got her first whiff.

Her neck snapped back and her head flung around in absolute disgust as she attempted to cope with the putrid aroma now filling her nostrils.

I quickly gauged the look on all the other faces and they appeared to be looking at the staff not me.

So I turned around to witness the manager speaking very sternly to all the staff who were present as I blurted out my dismay.

One of the female staff was staring at me with dagger eyes and I avoided her gaze so as to not give myself away.

I could hear those behind complaining about the disgusting smell and how employees should know better than to do something like that.

I received my order with an apology from the manager along with a small discount.

Mission accomplished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76357788


lol
A epiphany I had watering my lawn one day.

"Karma is the universal judicial system that NOBODY is Immune from"
JL2

User ID: 77227614
United States
02/10/2019 03:23 PM

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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
lmao
~Some will win, Some will lose, Some were born to sing the blues~

~I want to breathe when you breathe, When you whisper like that hot summer breeze, Count the beads of sweat that cover me, Didn't you show me a sign this time~
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 3168215
United States
02/10/2019 03:24 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Did it smell like halfway reheated 4 day old kangaroo sausage?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 70425218
United States
02/10/2019 03:28 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
You're semi retarded for making a thread like this. BUT nice, descriptive writing lol.

My husband does the same thing in public; letting one go and hoping someone walks through it.

Reminds me of when I was a kid. Me and my baby sister were walking through a back isle in target, and I had to far so bad. It was kind of a hot one, so you know the stench factor was a 10. Well, I let it RIP. Then we hurried and got the hell out of that isle and scrambled to the next one over. We see a lady walk through the isle I farted in, and we hear her loudly proclaim "EEEEEW, IT STINKS!"

That was one of my mission accomplished moments.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72511854
United States
02/10/2019 03:34 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Only low IQ minorities say dumb shit like "dropped ass"
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 36271174
United States
02/10/2019 03:37 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
It was a code red situation as the stench was overbearing, I had to think fast before anyone realised I was the culprit.

Being a seasoned professional I knew that walking away from the area would drag the foul smell along with me affording all in the vacinity a chance to label me as the offender.

I didn’t hesitate and in that moment I seized the day and proclaimed loudly, “For crying out loud, which one of you farted!?!”, while looking at all the McDonalds staff behind the counter.

I then screwed up my nose and turned around to judge the reactions on those waiting behind me and not a moment too soon as the lady directly behind me just got her first whiff.

Her neck snapped back and her head flung around in absolute disgust as she attempted to cope with the putrid aroma now filling her nostrils.

I quickly gauged the look on all the other faces and they appeared to be looking at the staff not me.

So I turned around to witness the manager speaking very sternly to all the staff who were present as I blurted out my dismay.

One of the female staff was staring at me with dagger eyes and I avoided her gaze so as to not give myself away.

I could hear those behind complaining about the disgusting smell and how employees should know better than to do something like that.

I received my order with an apology from the manager along with a small discount.

Mission accomplished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76357788


CSB-granny
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76141856
United States
02/10/2019 03:43 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77121933
United States
02/10/2019 03:47 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Fart is an acquired smell but like many fermented foods, it can be addictive. One mans stink is another’s delicacy - remember this next time you smell a rancid cloud, you may get a hankering...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 51302878
United States
02/10/2019 03:53 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
I thought this post was about somebody that got laid while waiting in a McDonald's line.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72335146
United States
02/10/2019 03:54 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Only low IQ minorities say dumb shit like "dropped ass"
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72511854


I say it was well written and OP has a gift of writing. Perhaps he's an author of sorts?
Vandaluminatti

User ID: 47710731
United States
02/10/2019 03:56 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Flatulence pron
Professional Vandal by birth
Assylum escape artist
and roving IQ test
4 legs good, 2 legs bad
Samuel Colt

User ID: 77330860
United States
02/10/2019 03:57 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
You're semi retarded for making a thread like this. BUT nice, descriptive writing lol.

My husband does the same thing in public; letting one go and hoping someone walks through it.

Reminds me of when I was a kid. Me and my baby sister were walking through a back isle in target, and I had to far so bad. It was kind of a hot one, so you know the stench factor was a 10. Well, I let it RIP. Then we hurried and got the hell out of that isle and scrambled to the next one over. We see a lady walk through the isle I farted in, and we hear her loudly proclaim "EEEEEW, IT STINKS!"

That was one of my mission accomplished moments.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 70425218


Crop Dusting


cropdusting:

The act of starting at one end of a person-filled room, ripping a nasty fart (the "thick" ones are better, as they cling more), then moving briskly to the other end of the room, staying ahead of your own stench, yet "dusting" the rest of the room with your flatulence.
I quickly went out the door to avoid blame after cropdusting the room.
Samuel Colt
Crowdedhouse

User ID: 58411545
United States
02/10/2019 08:30 PM

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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Crop dusting is much like carls jr not Mickey D's don't you think it ain't all over ur face tho lol
MaxHeadroomIntrusion

User ID: 75101718
United States
02/10/2019 08:39 PM

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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
I thought dropping ass was like when a stripper goes to the top of the pole and does the splits down on the floor hard. That ass drops.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74242198
United States
02/10/2019 08:41 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Interesting...usually that is what happens after the mCds "meal" but usually in liquid form. Did you go to BK before McDees?
UH..
User ID: 48813111
United States
02/10/2019 08:42 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
You're semi retarded for making a thread like this. BUT nice, descriptive writing lol.

My husband does the same thing in public; letting one go and hoping someone walks through it.

Reminds me of when I was a kid. Me and my baby sister were walking through a back isle in target, and I had to far so bad. It was kind of a hot one, so you know the stench factor was a 10. Well, I let it RIP. Then we hurried and got the hell out of that isle and scrambled to the next one over. We see a lady walk through the isle I farted in, and we hear her loudly proclaim "EEEEEW, IT STINKS!"

That was one of my mission accomplished moments.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 70425218


Crop Dusting


cropdusting:

The act of starting at one end of a person-filled room, ripping a nasty fart (the "thick" ones are better, as they cling more), then moving briskly to the other end of the room, staying ahead of your own stench, yet "dusting" the rest of the room with your flatulence.
I quickly went out the door to avoid blame after cropdusting the room.
 Quoting: Samuel Colt


AND YET...THERE IS THE TERM...CARPET BOMBING....I THINK THAT MEANS YOU JUST STAY THERE A BLOW ONE AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER....LIKE WHEN YA WANNA BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE
OR...IT'S YER RELATIVES
UH
User ID: 48813111
United States
02/10/2019 09:04 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
You're semi retarded for making a thread like this. BUT nice, descriptive writing lol.

My husband does the same thing in public; letting one go and hoping someone walks through it.

Reminds me of when I was a kid. Me and my baby sister were walking through a back isle in target, and I had to far so bad. It was kind of a hot one, so you know the stench factor was a 10. Well, I let it RIP. Then we hurried and got the hell out of that isle and scrambled to the next one over. We see a lady walk through the isle I farted in, and we hear her loudly proclaim "EEEEEW, IT STINKS!"

That was one of my mission accomplished moments.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 70425218


Crop Dusting


cropdusting:

The act of starting at one end of a person-filled room, ripping a nasty fart (the "thick" ones are better, as they cling more), then moving briskly to the other end of the room, staying ahead of your own stench, yet "dusting" the rest of the room with your flatulence.
I quickly went out the door to avoid blame after cropdusting the room.
 Quoting: Samuel Colt


AND YET...THERE IS THE TERM...CARPET BOMBING....I THINK THAT MEANS YOU JUST STAY THERE A BLOW ONE AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER....LIKE WHEN YA WANNA BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE
OR...IT'S YER RELATIVES
 Quoting: UH.. 48813111
Go Ozark!

User ID: 63155543
United States
02/10/2019 09:07 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Nice dissertation OP...you did well. Although that English guy has the best stories, full of vivid, flourished descriptions...This guy is the master of tales!

Thread: A man farted in a shop in Pakistan

Thread: Man farts on a packed Bus and causes chaos and negative karma

Thread: Pakistan Holiday reduced to abject Fart-Hell

Thread: Fiend On Coach Farts For 2 hours
Go Getters Go Ozark!

We're Big On That!

======================

Remember, I Was Vapour.

I Dream Of Wires.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 75716984
United States
02/10/2019 09:10 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
It was a code red situation as the stench was overbearing, I had to think fast before anyone realised I was the culprit.

Being a seasoned professional I knew that walking away from the area would drag the foul smell along with me affording all in the vacinity a chance to label me as the offender.

I didn’t hesitate and in that moment I seized the day and proclaimed loudly, “For crying out loud, which one of you farted!?!”, while looking at all the McDonalds staff behind the counter.

I then screwed up my nose and turned around to judge the reactions on those waiting behind me and not a moment too soon as the lady directly behind me just got her first whiff.

Her neck snapped back and her head flung around in absolute disgust as she attempted to cope with the putrid aroma now filling her nostrils.

I quickly gauged the look on all the other faces and they appeared to be looking at the staff not me.

So I turned around to witness the manager speaking very sternly to all the staff who were present as I blurted out my dismay.

One of the female staff was staring at me with dagger eyes and I avoided her gaze so as to not give myself away.

I could hear those behind complaining about the disgusting smell and how employees should know better than to do something like that.

I received my order with an apology from the manager along with a small discount.

Mission accomplished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76357788


stfu

Posts like yours is why ACs were barred from posting here for months.
UH
User ID: 48813111
United States
02/10/2019 09:28 PM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
It was a code red situation as the stench was overbearing, I had to think fast before anyone realised I was the culprit.

Being a seasoned professional I knew that walking away from the area would drag the foul smell along with me affording all in the vacinity a chance to label me as the offender.

I didn’t hesitate and in that moment I seized the day and proclaimed loudly, “For crying out loud, which one of you farted!?!”, while looking at all the McDonalds staff behind the counter.

I then screwed up my nose and turned around to judge the reactions on those waiting behind me and not a moment too soon as the lady directly behind me just got her first whiff.

Her neck snapped back and her head flung around in absolute disgust as she attempted to cope with the putrid aroma now filling her nostrils.

I quickly gauged the look on all the other faces and they appeared to be looking at the staff not me.

So I turned around to witness the manager speaking very sternly to all the staff who were present as I blurted out my dismay.

One of the female staff was staring at me with dagger eyes and I avoided her gaze so as to not give myself away.

I could hear those behind complaining about the disgusting smell and how employees should know better than to do something like that.

I received my order with an apology from the manager along with a small discount.

Mission accomplished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76357788


stfu

Posts like yours is why ACs were barred from posting here for months.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75716984


NEGETIVE...PLEASE SEE AND REVIEW THE FART THREADS ABOVE YOUR POST
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77166291
Australia
02/11/2019 03:34 AM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
Super pine requested.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13039040
United States
02/11/2019 03:36 AM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
You lost me at "vacinity".

Also your story was stupid, fake, and gay. Not funny at all.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 71611133
United States
02/11/2019 03:52 AM
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Re: Dropped ass while waiting in line at McDonalds
I think most people learned at like age 8 the person who acts like you did is guilty.

OP was eating Macca Assburgers because it's not smart to piss off people who make your food.