The ROOM...A Christian BrainStorming (((( Thread )))) Current Events...

Well, its good to know he is mad at more than one person I guess? Isaiah 62:6-7 I have posted watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem; they will never be silent day or night. You who call on the Lord, give yourselves no rest, and give him no rest till he establishes Jerusalem...

What does a watchman do, TW?

Wrong Email
A Minnesota couple decided to vacation to Florida during the winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile.....somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 16 May 2003
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is not as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here!

Hi Koffee! I've seen this email before. It's really a cute joke! Thanks for trying to lift the spirits in the room. Its been kind of a downer today.

That was strangely cute and sad at the same time!

Ok, I have a joke.



Question: What did the right butt cheek say to the left butt cheek?





Answer: If we stick together, we could keep this crap from getting out.

Hello everyone,
Just wanna inform you all that I'm having cable problems. Hopefully they will be taking care of Monday. I'm on my wife's IPad today lol

Hope all is well!

:book63:

LOL...
:cool11:

A great big "Good Morning" to you my friend.

I was going to call you today to make sure you were okay, but now I see that you are fine. That puts a smile on my face!

Hope you get that cable situation fixed soon.

I have to leave in about 20 minutes but should be back on by noon. Hope to see you on here then.

Love and Hugs to you,

LOL !

Good to see you Big Bro !

When I heard a Maryland person won the Mega Million, I immediately thought of you !

I don't think you would just take off from GLP would you ?

Here's another:

Twins

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amahl.
The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him Juan.


Years later Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mom.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband she wishes
she also had a picture of Amahl.


Her husband responds, "But they're twins -
if you've see Juan, you've seen Amahl."

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!"

In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. "The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.

The man sympathized with her and said, "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."

"You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind."

"That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."

You gals are in a joking mood lol !

Let me find one too...

The Backseat Driver

A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer.
The following exchange takes place.... The man says, "What's
the problem officer?"

Officer: "You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone."

Man: "No sir, I was going 65."

Wife: "Oh, Harry. You were going 80." (The man gives his wife a dirty look.)

Officer: "I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light."

Man: "Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!"

Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks."
(The man gives his wife another dirty look.)

Officer: "I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seatbelt."

Man: "Oh I just took it off when you were walking up to the car."

Wife: "Oh Harry, you never wear your seatbelt."

The man turns to his wife and yells, "SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"

The Officer turns to the woman and asks, "Ma'am, does your
husband talk to you this way all the time?"

The wife says, "No, only when he's drunk."

Who's there

WHAT IF EVE CAME BEFORE ADAM?

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So, how is everything going?" inquired God.

"It is all so beautiful, God," she replied.. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem.

It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain."

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc.. She felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced".

"That's a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away."

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes.
Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden.

"Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?"

"Just fantastic," she replied, "but for one oversight. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull.

All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone. "

God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right.. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you.

Let's see.....where did I put that useless boob?"

A little old lady went to the grocery store to buy cat food. She picked up four cans and took them to the check out counter.

The girl at the cash register said, "I'm sorry, but we cannot sell you cat food without proof that you have a cat. A lot of old people buy cat food to eat, and the management wants proof that you are buying the cat food for your cat."

The little old lady went home, picked up her cat and brought it back to the store. They sold her the cat food.

The next day, she tried to buy two cans of dog food.
Again the cashier said "I'm sorry, but we cannot sell you dog food without proof that you have a dog. A lot of old people buy dog food to eat, but the management wants proof that you are buying the dog food for your dog." So she went home and brought in her dog. She then was able to buy the dog food.

The next day she brought in a box with a hole in the lid.
The little old lady asked the cashier to stick her finger in the hole.

The cashier said, "No, you might have a snake in there."
The little old lady assured her that there was nothing in the box that would harm her.

So the cashier put her finger into the box and quickly pulled it out.

She said to the little old lady, "That smells like sh*t."

The little old lady said, "It is. I want to buy three rolls of toilet paper."


Don't mess with old people.

Always wondered why my wife called me a boob sometimes

I was on my way to post.........lol

Hi All, Just thought I'd drop in to see what's happening on this thread. I have not seen this thread before. It seems that all of the 'heavyweights' are here!

God Bless ALL here for the Kingdom of the Lord is found in His Brethren

Love Laura's sweet voice. "Blessings' is one of my favorites

My kitty approves! He says these jokes knock them out of the ball park! Hope you'all are enjoying your week-end! Thanks for the videos McGuyver and I'm glad its just your cable and that you're ok, TW!

Ouch! Kitty's strong lol

I know a few women who call their men "Boobies"

Daughter!

Where in NYC are you from? I'm in Brooklyn