OMG! A Secret JUST For the Women of GLP! Warning! This May Cause Strong Emotions!

"While on a my way to yet another tedious Board of Directors meeting in my demanding position as Chairperson of the Board. I realized I had left my Montegrappa Teatro La Fenice pen, (the one that I used to use to sign all of those phenomenally lucrative government contracts) back on my Gulfstream IV! My amazing assistant quickly came to the rescue. She jumped into the car and instructed the driver to rush to the nearest store. She later told me that as she tore through the aisles desperate to find a suitable writing instrument, the "BIC Cristal For Her Ball Pen" seemed to call out to her personally its singular, pastel siren song.

Returning to the board room, she handed me the BIC Cristal For Her Ball Pen. In front of our 1327 attending stockholders I impatiently grasped the instrument. Finally, I could sign the 143 page legal document and get back in the air on my way to the luxe charity gala I would be attending that night in Gstaad. As I took the pen in hand, I was immediately mesmerized by the soft, delicately feminine lines of the sensuously glistening shaft of this pen. Awakened by the Bic pens' alluringly pale blush of color I felt an involuntary catch in my breath. This was so unlike the bulky 18k rollerball I had up until then thought le plus ultra! When I touched the Bic pen to paper, the thick, silky ink flowed out of the pen like a sudden rush of champagne into a crystal flute on a moonlit night. The feeling of writing with this tool was so powerful, I was forced to close my eyes and faintly gasp in a shudder of ultimate pleasure. The unexpected release of female emotions almost made me weep. When I finally came out of my reverie, opened my eyes and lit that cigarette, everything in my world had inexplicably changed.

That was six years ago. Today I live on a quiet little farm on a cul de sac in Minnesota with my husband Al. We have four strapping sons (Gunnnarr, Mackx, And'rew,& Cohdee) and one beautiful daughter, Pheebie-Jaiyne. I spend my womanly days at home raising the children, tending the house, cooking up scrumptious meals for my family, inventing fun macaroni craft projects for the kids and thinking up new ways to please my handsome hubby. My BIC Cristal For Her Ball Pen is of course always by my side.

When my daughter reaches puberty, along with a slap across the face to remind her of the pain of being a woman, she will receive her first BIC Cristal For Her Ball Pen. What better gift could I give her on her path to true femininity?

Bic....I owe you! Because of your design and marketing team and the resulting colored plastic writing clichés, I now live the life that every woman never knew she dreamed of!

My assistant? Oh! She married one of the farm hands and works for us 5 days a week as our housekeeper. We are all so very happy! THANK YOU BIC!"

Thank you for this, tis hilarious :)

then there's this one post



"I haven't had a girlfriend for a few years now. I consider myself 'between relationships' when people ask, but the truth is I just have a hard time trusting women. They're always wanting a guy to pay for everything and take them on dates and stuff even tho they KNO guys aren't into that kinda stuff. So it seems kinda unequality to me, when i think about it. On top of that we're stuposed to do all the hard work and they just put dishes in the dishwasher n stuff.

So when i heard of this pen and read how feminine it is, i KNOW i had to have one! i immediately ordred the six pack because A) I like six packs! (in my fridge at least) and B) because 6 women is better than ONE any day!!!

So the pens arrived and i found them just as sensual and curvaceous as promised! i prefer the 'Caucasian Labia' colored one, as well as them Avatar Labia colors in the pack. The orange one is a little suspiciously too much like some ethnic type, so i don't use that one.

Anyway-- i'm here to say: guys, these pens aren't just for women-- they're for guys who hate real women and can't afford a Real Doll! I already ordered the Bic for Her Fashion Retractable ball set of two, and am excitedly waiting the twins to arrive!! They're the most expensive girls offered by Bic, and I already named them Mila and Natalie! It's gonna be like having my own private Black Swan lesbo scene right in my house!"

OMG and the thing is you cant put down a comment unless you buy it! lmao

omfg this is the best thread ever. At first I didn't get it. You trying to sell me on bic pens? wtf? really? bic must really be struggling. lmfao. Then I saw the reviews and really was like wow that is hilarious. Love it. 5*

5 stars!
PRICELESS!

omfg this is the best thread ever. At first I didn't get it. You trying to sell me on bic pens? wtf? really? bic must really be struggling. lmfao. Then I saw the reviews and really was like wow that is hilarious. Love it. 5*

A joke five star review is one thing, but a one star review that you don't mean is actually libelous. (Technically, if it is meant to harm, so are the fake five stars)

Yeah.

LOL at this one:

"As a woman, I've spent my whole life pretty bummed out about the fact that I could never find a pen that matches the color of labia. So, when I heard that Bic had created a pen specifically to match my womanly form, for the first time in my life I became proud to have an infinite abyss shameful sin hole between my legs.

While the colors are great, this pen has A LOT of great features. My favorite might be the GPS Locator for my wandering uterus. Just one click and I can know exactly where that hysterical whore hole is in my body during the times that I am not pregnant."

Pastel Colored Bic pens gets a 3 page thread?

It is some of the funniest chick-lit-satire I've seen on the 'net, all hiding in a secret Amazon comment thread!

LOL, I've seen that. Here's the "Maxi Pad" letter, cracks me up every time I read it....enjoy!

[link to wendi-aarons.blogspot.com]

Hilarious!

I got lost in these for almost an hour!!!


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