What's the most badass thing you've ever done?

Took a huge shit at test depth on a Trident ballistic missile submarine and touched myself while my feet were touching a missile tube more than once.

By comparison traveling around the world underwater, visiting the North Pole & 102 countries, firing off 4 ballistic missiles, surviving flooding, fire, falling overboard in 32F water, driving the Alps on a motorcycle and speeding down the autobahn at 150 mph seems pretty lame...

Puerto Rico

New Orleans gets it this year

How is it luck to win a Grammy? Sheesh

Left DC headed to Daytona Florida. Back in the day triple A provided what was called a trip tik which said the trip should take 12 hours.

We left at 6pm and based on trip tik thought we would arrive around 6am.

Around 2am we stopped at a truck stop in Savannah. We all remember eating but our next memory was sitting on a side street in Savannah. Sun was coming up, we really couldn't figure out why or how we were on the side street but we got back on the interstate nd continued towards Daytona.

We figured the trip tik was wrong because it was 6am and we were still 4 hours from Daytona. We really didn't think that much more about it.

When returning home we planned for a 16 hour trip but made it home in 12 hours.

There is more to the story that makes me pretty sure that those 4 hours were either ufo or some other paranormal experience.

I will go into more detail if interested

OMG That is my story almost exactly only it was Labor day. I was on a Mule and we live on top of a 200 yard 45 degree slope put in neutral and upon come to the end which has a 90 degree turn or the lake ramp which is where I was heading. I dont recall but we think I hit the pot hole which thru me on to the road while the Mule went Airbound. Hit 4 trees ejected and shattered everything including the seats. I woke up in the road checking my self for broken bones and blood. The people I was coming to play with were not there so I was alone. I located the mule way ahead having missed my hubby's brand new truck by about an inch. I slowly went over pushed the seat up enough to get in and hoped it would start, it did so I slowly went up the hill from hell which is what I have always called it. My other friends were in my pool so they say me and my blood, I woke up the next morning with ice bags head to toe. I still have bumps on my head and ringing in my ears but I am alive and thank God I survived my stupidity. A trip to hear someone else had an identical story. Cheers to life!

Ok.

So, at the time I was 17 and I invited 2 girls from school to go with me. I was close with one of them and her parents liked me so they were fine with her going with me. The other girl's parents wanted to meet me. Her father was a DC Police Officer, we talked for a few minutes and he told his daughter that whatever her mom decided he would be fine with.

This is where it gets weird. I remember my conversation with her like it was yesterday. She called me back to the den where she was sitting in a rocker with a blanket on her lap. To me she gave off like a gypsy vibe. She reached both of her hands out and told me to hold her hands which I did.

Once we were holding hands I felt her hands go from ice cold to hot over about 15 seconds. While holding my hands her eyes were closed. After about 30 seconds she opened her eyes. Not sure how to describe this but her eyes looked like a blind persons at that point. She let go of my hands and said her daughter could go but I needed to be aware that we would all be changed at the end of the trip. She said when you return and drop the girls off that would be the last time I saw either of them.

Hmmm, weird I said to myself but I didn't give it much more thought. A week later we went on the trip, we returned a week after that. I dropped them both off and never spoke to either of them again. To this day I have no idea why I never saw them again, I know when I dropped them both off everything seemed fine. It was not a conscious thing on my part to not see them again. The one girl I wss very close with prior to the trip, spoke to her 2 or 3 times a week.

The whole thing is just weird and the only thing I can think of is that something happened in Savannah during those missing 4 hours and somehow the one girls mother was able to foresee it.

"Bad-ass" can be interpreted at least a couple of ways---1) very tough or brave or fool-hardy at the time, or 2) something we survived but would not choose to do over again.

Most of mine are in the second category. One or two are kind of combinations.

Once on a hunting trip in Australia, I wounded a buffalo. Follow-up required about a mile of chasing and trying to get close enough to finish the job. The last 300 yards were through a swamp with known saltwater croc presence. Finished the job by putting the bull down in knee deep water. Had to sit on the dead bull to catch my breath--no other dry spots. Had one cartridge left and 300 yards of swamp to get out without getting eaten. The duck-lice cercariae drilled lots of holes in my legs, and my pocket camera drowned when I fell in over my shirt-pocket in one of the holes.

Two days later, helped trap a 14.5 ft cattle-eating croc not far from earlier adventure.

The hotter the summer
The bigger the hurricane
X..

Shot a deer between the eyes from 300 yards with a 22 rifle.

Yeah. Lucky too because I was aiming for the neck.

Meh. I meant 100 yards...300 feet.

Lol 300 yards woulda been epic.

Shotgun on a Garbage Truck in Poland.

Been to india... don't try that kids...


Skydiving

Pulled friend out of frozen pond

Stem cells injected into eyeballs...


Snatched an 88lb kettlebell

Ok not by my will or classic badass but my best story ....short version...spoke to my brother on phone who called me from another place or time but same phone number while my real brother was trying to call me ... some bonafide timeline parallel universe shit

Had an OBE after reading 1 paragraph on how to do it

I once took a cookie from a toddler while his mothers back was turned.

I used to skydive, and I like it a lot. I don't like to pull the rip cord early because I do like to go fast. And I used to have a lot of crashes with my high speed parachuting (I got yelled at a lot also). I took out five golfers I an attempted sand trap landing but hit the them instead. I really can't complain, they were really soft. Much softer than the side of the airplane hanger I used the next time, that shit almost didn't buff out. It was pretty fucked for sure but I did limp away successfully.

I need to get back to work on the autotard fix for the SwiftKey AI bot, this is a literal joke.

Adrenaline is the patron angel of the badass.

I always take candy from babies and give them lemon slices instead.

I offered to play a ha d of seven cars stud for thirty minutes of bedtime with my little boy. We were just learning the game. He could not read. I fully intended to lie.

I wash shuffling as we made the bet.

I dealt myself nothing to work with but arranged what I extended to call a “split house” or some no esense.

He showed me his hand all excited wonder.

I’d dealt him a seven card royal flush.

He asked on his innocence who won. Speared my heart . I said he won.

I fanned the deck. Nothing else was in any order.

I never lied to my boy again.

The god of poker hands made me honest as a badass Quaker.

Yes! Interested. Start a ufo or missing time thread and tell us.

The deer was the lucky one.

Had my picture with the main cast of Aliens. Been onstage watching Megadeth and Anthrax play. Spent an hour talking with Layne Staley of Alice in Chains back in 1992. Worked for a former President. Sang Megadeth in front of 900 people at a company meeting. Met hundreds of celebrities in my life. I have Lived a very eventful life.

Pulled a guy out of a burning car.

Toughest guy I ever met was a family-practice/ER doc who also liked to race stock cars. At a big wreck at the track, one of the other cars caught on fire and the driver was unconscious. My friend pulled him out--got severe burns on both hands--took years of grafting and special gloves to heal to where he could do surgeries again. He still practices at nearly 77 years old, has had a dozen or more arterial stents, multiple joint replacements and a bad back---and he still is pleasant when he takes care of every-day patients in the ER. If they knew what he has been through, a few of them might be embarassed to be complaining of subjective pains.

Correction, That was the most cowardly thing you've ever done. Never has a bully ever been called badass.

Bump.