DAMMIT!! I was doing IMPORTANT research!!

Oh... it's 5 already? Time to hit box wine.

After 5 now heck with it.

Substitute Martinis and I have the same predicament.

Ah! 22 past! Have to make up for lost time...

I'm right there with you, only I mowed my lawn last Saturday, so I can just sit inside and enjoy the buzz guilt free. Also, the wife is a retail manager and won't get home until late, so I can just enjoy it without any guff!

Yeah, I said the word guff. What are you going to do about it?

I'm going to give you positive karma for being a man of action and not being afraid to say guff!

It depends on the size of the yard. Also what kind of mower you have. If you have a riding mower, 8 beers should be perfect. A push mower and a lawn less than 1 acre I'd go with 5-6

Don't worry I'm a beerologist.

Holy shit, I'm pinned...LOL!

Get TPTB to Bane you..theres a law agaist drunkk people using computerthingis.

I'd like to see your credentials OP...I'm not sure your qualified to do this kind of research.

^Important work^

7.5 acres

I do the majority with a tractor and bush hog, but I like to use a push mower around the buildings and in some of the smaller fenced areas.

The tractor has a cupholder. The push mower doesn't.

This is complicated stuff!

OOh, that's a lot of variables.

hmm Maybe start with 4-5, do the push mower work. Then use the tractor where you have the cup holder and you could have another 3 while on the tractor.

Dunno about yard work, but we spent three days at Kings Island and it takes 4 beers to get me to ride Drop Zone:

I performed this experiment years ago so I'll give you the answer.

what is the optimal amount of beer to drink before doing yardwork?


All of them of course

Hey, it's not all fun and games, one miscalculation and I have to deal with a hangover.

I only ever experimented with having a beer and/or smoking a joint. its ok if its not too hot. the light is all glossy and the colors so vibrant, I wish I was young again
beer makes me groogy in the sun if im trying to work/play
I would strive for the perfect amount for after the yard work is done and your kicking back on the patio looking over a perfect manacured yard with the smell of bbq wafting around you.

most of the lawns here are dried to straw, only corporations and dedicated rich people that water all the time or inground sprinklers, have any green grass to mow

the bankers and doctors here will keep the golf courses green right through armageddon, when the only thing on the course is zombies running to-and-fro. and the dying masses have withered in dehydration.

Can't mow because you're too drunk? Drive it off.

Jebhus! what a great scene.

That is the theory I've been trying to prove!

Then you can help the economy by giving money to the court!!!

I've discovered by accident is that to prevent hangover, drink 2 large cups of water and hope you don't piss in the bed.

You are disturbed!

It's the rain round our parts thats going to drive me to drink.

All worthy endeavors have the possibility of negative consequences attached man... bravo for your bravery in the face of danger!