So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...

Yes well being a Woman I have to agree with you somewhat

But.

What I was trying to say is his thought pattern was probably a lot more like what I originally posted

I think it's wonderful he remembered you at all. Honestly, if a partner forgets birthdays, anniversaries, ect. They just don't care! This man cares.

Dollars to donuts he heard you say once that you wish you had a pretty comforter, or admiring someones comforter. He thought he was going to thrill you with the fact that he was attentive.

I hope that you lavish him with praise, and act like he just gave you a 5 carat diamond!

Men are like dogs, (No offense guys).... They love to please. Give them praise and they will keep bringing you gifts!

OTOH if you act ugly about the gifts they give you, you will get less and less of them, because they will think that they can never please you.

JMHO

nice combo, have you ever stated that those are your favorite colors?

agreed!

^^This^^ is correct.

no i like purple and teal but thats really not what matters. the red does match the room nicely though

Maybe you need to be more open about your wants - let him know in a nice way about things you like or would appreciate I've noticed that the real "witches" seem to be so direct and demanding, and I think men actually appreciate knowing what is expected of them...
But who am I to give advice. I got a - flashlight, yes a flashlight - on a second year of dating birthday. Needleess to say I jettisoned him quickly after that.
If he treats you well, and you are basically happy, give it another year, and practice the more direct approach to your needs. You are both very young.

he buys crappy gifts AND he won't sleep with you in the same bed, AND he keeps you as a secret from his family.

aw girlfriend, the blanket is the least of your problems.

dump his ass.oy. you know having read about your bf's other behaviour the blanket seems like the most romantic aspect of his character, i'm sorry but that one is not a keeper.

this was a practical man giving a practical gift.

Maybe he (unconscionsly) is looking to see how you react to such things.

I have told my son (21 years old), that if a woman is looking for your money, she will want jewelry, expensive clothes, expensive meals, expensive shoes. You can count on this never changing with this female. You better have a great career and be ready to let her spend it all because she will, and she will point her finger at you when you are giving her enough of it.

A young lady who is satisfied with a comforter as a gift, is a young lady who has some wisdom, see's the gift for the warmth and character it is given in, and realizes this is a man who cares about your basic needs, not your shallow ones.

He is probably a keeper.

you guys are right. i never said i needed a comforter and i liked the one i had honestly. and its not like he "remembered" everyone kept telling him about it and bringing it up because i spent my last birthday alone. this is the first birthday we've ever spent together so i dont know what i was expecting. i am glad he remembered though.

like i said before, a flower and hand written note would have been more nice and personal. its not about dollar value or jewelry or whatever its about romance...

STFU and enjoy your goddamn gift!
How many times has he bought you dinner? Drove you places? Took you out, to make you happy?

Give the guy a friggin blowjob, or two while you're at it! Be thankful you have a boyfriend who cares enough and not some sleazy dirtbag jock who'll fuck you a few times and never call you again.

Women...geezus fucking christ!!! What is wrong with you?

You sound like an ungrateful nag.

He's your boyfriend, not your husband. You don't even know for sure if he'll still be around a year from now. He got something he thought you'd like....not sure what the problem is?

you have great points
he is 10 years older than me though so we're not both young lol

I LOLed.

My husband is usually good at picking out gifts, but sometimes he'll throw me for a loop. 2 years ago, I received a set of pots and pans. (apparently I had mentioned that I needed to get a good new set.... ha ha)

OP, I think you scored, new comforter, hard drive and a costume?

It may not be gushing with romanticism, but maybe his way of thinking is even if he's not there to keep you warm, the comforter he got you will be.

Also maybe he didn't want to be cliche....

not that its any of your business but i did give him a bj yesterday and i didnt get shit. i am grateful i just was hoping for something PERSONAL. just a damn letter letting me know he cares would have been nice. shit.

Sounds like a nice gift to me OP :)

wtf did you expect him to get you, a dirk diggler replica dildo?

To give with the expectation or hope of reciprocation is not giving.

IMO: A "I'll scratch your back if you scratch my back" relationship is not based on love.

Good luck OP.

Sorry to be blunt but....

1) You sleep in sepereate rooms.
2) He doesn't even man up and let you have the bedroom, you get the garage??
3) He still talks to his ex-girlfriend and seeems to do more for her than you?
4) He is 10 years older than you and will not let his parents know you are together?

I'm not sure what type of romance you are expecting out of this situation.

Well, i got my wife a crock pot our first Christmas. Eight years later we're still together so i guess she didn't hate it.

Just wait till you get married then it will be sexy things like vacuum cleaners,toasters,etc.
The comforter set is fine but I wonder if you had hinted at wanting a new comforter or given hints for other things.
Maybe he is just being practical.Personally I would rather have a comforter compared to roses for example because its something that lasts and you can keep.
Sounds like he may have bought you things he thought you wanted.A lot of men just dont have that incentive to try and whine and dine us to makes us swoon.As I have gotten older I have grown to like the practical man much more than the swooner.The practical man is usually a keeper with a level head .

it was my birthday...usually people dont trade gifts on birthdays although i did buy the food/drinks and stuff.

and you guys are right. it is practical. a blankets nice and im grateful for it and never said i wasn't. hes treated me great but yes there are problems with his passive aggresiveness that's caused him to lie in order just to avoid confrontation. i should just be grateful and shut up

You need to find a new boyfriend.Sorry but he isnt serious about you.Has nothing to do with your gift.From reading the other stuff posted since I replied earlier it doesnt appear you have much of a relationship.

I bought my wife a very nice throw-comforter for a wedding anniversary and had it embroidered with penguins (her absolute favorite animal) representing her and I. During the embroidering process we found out we were having a child and I added a baby penguin to the others and our last name on it. She absolutely loved it. Maybe he could have made it more personal but don't be spoiled. I'm happy to get boxers and socks on my gift-days. He could have gotten you nothing. Your comment about him stopping the day before during lunch break seems a bit bitter. Don't lie to him, if you don't like it let him know how else will he know how to please the almighty?

..."honey, i'd love to give you a bj, but this damn comforter is in the way.."

consider the fact that you might be a pretty lame girlfriend Lucky. you might be "good enough" to stay with for a year. there are a lot of horrible women out there, and a "good enough" one is worth holding on to.. until you fall in love again. a girl who is "good enough" will never hurt your feelings when she ends up cheating or leaving you for whatever reason. how much do you make him laugh? how much passion is in your relationship? do you pay attention to him? do you know anything about him that his mates or his ex don't? when he asks you why you love him, can you say anything more than "because you're sweet and handsome and caring" (ie, shit anyone can say about anyone)

a comforter might be more than you deserve.

Nicely said... I agree. We are also just simple folk and are not good mind-readers. If he sees this post, it will probably be the last gift you ever get from him. My wife got me a $10 belt for my birthday. It was just what I needed, it was (in my opinion) a thoughtful gift, and I'm wearing it now :)

Men and women are just different creatures. Embrace it.

It is better to try and fail, than to not try at all.

Sounds like a smart man... buying you something needed and not just pretty things....


you are materialistic, and you don;t see what a nice thing he did... you just want your shiny piece of jewelry...