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Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!

 
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:05 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
Most of you already know the drill. There's been some success with these threads in the past so who knows, if you're alone eating ice cream out of the box in your snuggie watching How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days in tears, or you've just finished painting your fingernails red, sitting on your hand till it goes numb and jacking off in the mirror so it feels like a stranger...

You might want to give this thread a chance...

Post a picture of yourself if you aren't too shy and/or just tell everyone about yourself so we can secretly judge and possibly mock you into realization you're destined to be alone forever...

I'll start things off...

calmshocker


35 and single although I frequent tinder quite often. Once took a long walk down the beach and cut my foot open on broken glass.

Looking for that special someone who won't poison my food and isn't shy to pick up a random drunk chick from the bar for some three way action!

Living in Canada under Liberal Dictatorship, looking for marriage/citizenship.
 Quoting: CalmShock


Too bad you live in Canada. 34 y/o Irish/German female here in the states single after 1.5 year relationship break-up.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 73989142


I'm geographically challenged...

It's not my fault, I was born this way...
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
pool
oops........

User ID: 70566490
United States
02/15/2017 12:05 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
I would love a relationship.
 Quoting: pool


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


humping
 Quoting: CalmShock


humping
Don't dismiss your own experience to allow other people’s perceptions.
Simple27

User ID: 48123712
United States
02/15/2017 12:06 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
chuckle
~*Ride the Wave*~
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:07 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
I would love a relationship.
 Quoting: pool


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


how close are you to Canada groucho
Nefarious Libertine

User ID: 73541692
United States
02/15/2017 12:08 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


humping
 Quoting: CalmShock


humping
 Quoting: pool


lmao

Stranger things have happened.
We do not learn from history because our studies are brief and prejudiced. In a surprising manner, 250 years emerges as the average length of national greatness. This average has not varied for 3,000years. The stages of the rise and fall of great nations seem to be:
The Age of Pioneers , The Age of Conquests ,The Age of Commerce ,The Age of Affluence ,The Age of Intellect ,The Age of Decadence.
Decadence is marked by: Defensiveness, Pessimism, Materialism,Frivolity An influx of foreigners The Welfare State A weakening of religion. Decadence is due to: Too long a period of wealth and power, Selfishness Love of money ,The loss of a sense of duty.
The life histories of great states are amazingly similar, and are due to internal factors. Their falls are diverse, because they are largely the result of external causes. - Sir John Glubb The Fate of Empires
We are at the end of the Age of Decadence heading into COLLAPSE
Sweetroll Bandit

User ID: 71705824
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02/15/2017 12:08 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


humping
 Quoting: CalmShock


humping
 Quoting: pool



[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
"What is better - to be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?" - Paarthurnax

"We all go a little mad sometimes." - Norman Bates
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:08 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
I would love a relationship.
 Quoting: pool


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


how close are you to Canada groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


is that you sugar twig??? I can zero in on your use of smilies...
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
pool
oops........

User ID: 70566490
United States
02/15/2017 12:08 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
chuckle
 Quoting: Simple27


chuckle
:stimpybb:
Don't dismiss your own experience to allow other people’s perceptions.
pool
oops........

User ID: 70566490
United States
02/15/2017 12:09 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
I would love a relationship.
 Quoting: pool


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


how close are you to Canada groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437



pilot
Don't dismiss your own experience to allow other people’s perceptions.
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:10 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


humping
 Quoting: CalmShock


humping
 Quoting: pool


2late
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
Kraut the Deplorable

User ID: 43461814
United States
02/15/2017 12:11 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


Well here's a dapper looking dude if I might say so myself...

Post puppy pics dude, I've cracked the code..
 Quoting: CalmShock


I added puppy pics, got him from the rescue when he was 4 months old. What code did you crack?
 Quoting: X1811


That canines attract the chicks.
 Quoting: Kraut the Deplorable


The staff at doggie daycare said he had two girlfriends, but that sounds like asking for trouble to me ;-)
 Quoting: X1811


Well he looks like such a gentleman I bet those bitches fight over him.
Never forsake a Kraut for the sake of forsaking a Kraut
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:13 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


groucho
 Quoting: pool


how close are you to Canada groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


is that you sugar twig??? I can zero in on your use of smilies...
 Quoting: CalmShock


hey nutcracker wasup
I see your up to your usual bad behavior
X1811

User ID: 73316485
United States
02/15/2017 12:13 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: pool


humping
 Quoting: CalmShock


humping
 Quoting: pool



[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
 Quoting: Sweetroll Bandit


Cue laugh track!
[link to youtu.be (secure)]
All characters and events in this forum --even those based on real people-- are entirely fictional. All celebrity comments are impersonated...poorly. The above post contains coarse language and due to the content it should not be viewed by anyone.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:14 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
chuckle
 Quoting: Simple27


chuckle
:stimpybb:
 Quoting: pool


wrong hole

here let me help you
Simple27

User ID: 48123712
United States
02/15/2017 12:15 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
chuckle
 Quoting: Simple27


chuckle
:stimpybb:
 Quoting: pool


lol

:s27winks:
~*Ride the Wave*~
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:17 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


groucho
 Quoting: pool


how close are you to Canada groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


is that you sugar twig??? I can zero in on your use of smilies...
 Quoting: CalmShock


hey nutcracker wasup
I see your up to your usual bad behavior
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


Holy fuck folks... the original duo.. reunited...

Good to see ya old buddy, but you know the drill... The gloves are off.

Whose love are we fighting for this time? I promise I won't tell her about the belly button herpes...
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
X1811

User ID: 73316485
United States
02/15/2017 12:18 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


I added puppy pics, got him from the rescue when he was 4 months old. What code did you crack?
 Quoting: X1811


That canines attract the chicks.
 Quoting: Kraut the Deplorable


The staff at doggie daycare said he had two girlfriends, but that sounds like asking for trouble to me ;-)
 Quoting: X1811


Well he looks like such a gentleman I bet those bitches fight over him
 Quoting: Kraut the Deplorable


I bet you caused a fight or two amongst the fellas. Speaking of classy bitches...
[link to youtu.be (secure)]

Last Edited by X1811 on 02/15/2017 12:25 AM
All characters and events in this forum --even those based on real people-- are entirely fictional. All celebrity comments are impersonated...poorly. The above post contains coarse language and due to the content it should not be viewed by anyone.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:19 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


how close are you to Canada groucho
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


is that you sugar twig??? I can zero in on your use of smilies...
 Quoting: CalmShock


hey nutcracker wasup
I see your up to your usual bad behavior
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


Holy fuck folks... the original duo.. reunited...

Good to see ya old buddy, but you know the drill... The gloves are off.

Whose love are we fighting for this time? I promise I won't tell her about the belly button herpes...
 Quoting: CalmShock


im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
pool
oops........

User ID: 70566490
United States
02/15/2017 12:21 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437

Multitasking.
Don't dismiss your own experience to allow other people’s perceptions.
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:22 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


is that you sugar twig??? I can zero in on your use of smilies...
 Quoting: CalmShock


hey nutcracker wasup
I see your up to your usual bad behavior
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


Holy fuck folks... the original duo.. reunited...

Good to see ya old buddy, but you know the drill... The gloves are off.

Whose love are we fighting for this time? I promise I won't tell her about the belly button herpes...
 Quoting: CalmShock


im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


It's easy to see how the condition could become an issue in this case...

damned

Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...

Last Edited by CalmShock on 02/15/2017 12:23 AM
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:25 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437

Multitasking.
 Quoting: pool


nice
I like ladies who can multitask ;)
thats what the good Lord gave you two hands and 3 holes for
pool
oops........

User ID: 70566490
United States
02/15/2017 12:25 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...
 Quoting: CalmShock


I have many allergies:

Children
Doctors
Pets
&
Your memories
Don't dismiss your own experience to allow other people’s perceptions.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:25 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


hey nutcracker wasup
I see your up to your usual bad behavior
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


Holy fuck folks... the original duo.. reunited...

Good to see ya old buddy, but you know the drill... The gloves are off.

Whose love are we fighting for this time? I promise I won't tell her about the belly button herpes...
 Quoting: CalmShock


im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


It's easy to see how the condition could become an issue in this case...

damned

Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...
 Quoting: CalmShock


I never had herpes

I think you are getting me mixed up with patrick bateman

lol
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:26 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437

Multitasking.
 Quoting: pool


nice
I like ladies who can multitask ;)
thats what the good Lord gave you two hands and 3 holes for
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


AAAaaaaand... that statement was essentially the equivalent of throwing in the towel...

VICTORY IS MINE



Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73987861
United States
02/15/2017 12:27 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
:force:
 Quoting: Simple27


:CAT LOL:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:27 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...
 Quoting: CalmShock


I have many allergies:

Children
Doctors
Pets
&
Your memories
 Quoting: pool


we're a match made in heaven hugs

I do not have 3 of those you listed
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:27 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...
 Quoting: CalmShock


I have many allergies:

Children
Doctors
Pets
&
Your memories
 Quoting: pool


Hmph... nevermind

must be a lesbian.

backsout
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 46772437
Canada
02/15/2017 12:28 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437

Multitasking.
 Quoting: pool


nice
I like ladies who can multitask ;)
thats what the good Lord gave you two hands and 3 holes for
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


AAAaaaaand... that statement was essentially the equivalent of throwing in the towel...

VICTORY IS MINE



 Quoting: CalmShock


you'll never learn nutcracker lol
CalmShock  (OP)

User ID: 44402532
Canada
02/15/2017 12:30 AM
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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
...


Holy fuck folks... the original duo.. reunited...

Good to see ya old buddy, but you know the drill... The gloves are off.

Whose love are we fighting for this time? I promise I won't tell her about the belly button herpes...
 Quoting: CalmShock


im trying to nail pool
but shes busy fingering her belly button hole
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


It's easy to see how the condition could become an issue in this case...

damned

Ok pool, who's it going to be? Let's be clear here... sugar twig doesn't have a puppy...
 Quoting: CalmShock


I never had herpes

I think you are getting me mixed up with patrick bateman

lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46772437


I was wondering earlier in the thread where that guy went... Maybe his head fell off his shoulders after all the neck surgeries... :/
Patience is a virtue I just can't wait to achieve - CalmShock
Lilbabez33

User ID: 74049324
United States
02/15/2017 12:32 AM

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Re: Valentines Day 2017 Dating Thread!!!
" Looking for that special someone who won't poison my food and isn't shy to pick up a random drunk chick from the bar for some three way action!"


Now that's a very special girl your on the lookout for.

wtf
 Quoting: sacred energy


I'd be ok with the occasional prostate massage also... nothing past the second knuckle though ladies, I have standards...
 Quoting: CalmShock


Sorry I would help but I have no hands bubba...can get in up to the elbow?
If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough."
-Albert Einstein
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